Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
All the doctor said was why
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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