They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Your tits are I can't wait for
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
When are your genitals available?
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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