It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize