Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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