The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
