my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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