what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
