check it out our google latitudes are spooning
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
