Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
