i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
