ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
