omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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