You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize