And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
