Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
