DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
so much tequila, so little girl.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
