Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
