I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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