The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
