Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
