i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
