so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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