I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
