hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
this hospital has no fireball
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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