she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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