i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize