I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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