it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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