are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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