so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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