Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
