he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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