garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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