How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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