im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
