im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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