There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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