isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize