i jhust puked up my retainher.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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