so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
