I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
