I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
