So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
