Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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