Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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