Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
