I want to make a zoo with you.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
