the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
is wine microwaveable?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
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