Quick, to the slutcave!
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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