Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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