i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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